Life Of Women In A Patriarchal Society: Tsitsi Dangarembga And Mariama Ba

How do the authors Tsitsi Dangarembga and Mariama Ba make it difficult for women to survive in a patriarchal society in their literary works; “Nervous conditions” and “So long a letter”?

Introduction

The hardships of womanhood in a patriarchal society have been portrayed to their full capacity in the two books “Nervous conditions “and “So long a letter” by authors Tsitsi and Mariama. The titles of the two books already on their own foreshadow on conduciveness of the environment women are subjected to in a patriarchal society. Nervous conditions which is the mental state of Nyasha is caused by the contrast of her life (with whites) as a child to her current life (in a patriarchal society) which have shown great transition from one another. She is thrust head on into this society with endless expectations about women.

Narrative development

“I was not sorry when my brother died”. This powerful opening statement serves to create conflict between the siblings which therefore makes the reader curious and eager to know of the reasons behind such great animosity amongst the siblings. In essence this already puts Nhamo, the said brother under close speculation of the reader hence he assumes the role of a villain and Tambu is therefore more in favor of the reader’s intake on the whole issue.

“Moreover women smelt of unhealthy reproductive odours…men gave off strong aromas of reproductive labour”. From this statement we realize the belittlement of women and the insinuation that all they are capable of doing is endless bearing of babies and it’s portrayed as if the conception of this babies depends solely on women. Men are attributed with an important vice of labour; this has elevated them for they are given the responsibility of ensuring women’s means of survival. The choice of diction goes further to enhance how capabilities of women are considered to be unbearably repulsive whereas men’s contribution is considered to be of vital importance.

Nhamo’s presence is made a deciding factor of the opportunities that Tambu could get. This is highlighted where Nhamo gets the benefit of going to school while Tambu’s desire to go to school is totally overlooked. Ma’shingayi showed great devotion to her son’s education more than she did with Tambu. This insinuates that Tambu being a second born and a female was not entirely entitled to such devotion and selfless act of will from her mother. In this case we can deduce that Tambu was completely stripped off and denied parental care and love. Ma’shingayi worked tooth and nail to procure money for Nhamo’s school fees, this serves to show the uselessness of education for women as a woman’s duty is to fend for the husband and the babies, which is very exploitative, restricting and ignorant to the wants of a woman. Women’s lives and sense of purpose are made to rotate around the sole existence of men.

In her attempt to try and dissuade Tambuzai from taking the initiative to procure school fees on her own, Ma’shingayi tells her daughter Tambudzai how the business of womanhood is heavy burden. She continues to tell her that when there are sacrifices to be made women are the ones to make them. Her reference to womanhood being a heavy burden brings to attention the suppression and the unsavoury lives that women are subjected to. Women are also forced into the service of men be it their husband or sons in the sense that her husband who rightfully (if we were to regard the stereotypes that women have to align their lives to) should be the breadwinner of the family seemed unperturbed by lack of school fees for his children therefore she felt obligated to do something about the situation.

life of women, and her resigned tone shows that they have given up hope on ever being held hostage by the societal expectations; in addition she is expectant that Tambudzai would heed to her supposed advice and resign herself to this unbecoming fate. Gender stereotyping is depicted in her pep talk as she insinuates that Tambudzai must not question but just accept how things are. In other words she says that a woman’s future and life has already been put out for them to live and that they have to bring along is the strength not education to carry themselves through the hardships of womanhood. In this regard we are aware of the pressurizing expectations that accompany the life of a woman despite of the age.

“Can you cook books and feed them to your husband?” this is a question that was addressed to Tambudzai by her father when she pleaded to go to school showed obduracy. This question has vividly shown the societal stereotypes about women and education, it suggests that a woman has

“Maiguru was well looked after by Babamukuru, in a big house on the mission…”.this statement serves as an introduction and makes a representation of the middle class families which has portrayed men as the only ones who have the financial power therefore bringing the dependency of the women on men. We learn as the book progresses that Maiguru is a working woman; this raises the question as to why the financial muscle is only accredited to Babamukuru whereas Maiguru also without a doubt makes a contribution to their current style of living this therefore shows that women’s gain of merit is always overshadowed if not accredited to the presence of a man in her life. “Maiguru was driven about in a car”, this statement depicts women as idle and shallow beings with no sense of direction. “Well-kempt and fresh clean all the time”. From this sentence we see the reinforcement of the belief mentioned prior that without the labour of men, women would not be well taken care if not for men. The hygienic aspect of a woman is therefore accredited to the men which has in turn portrayed women as untidy and uncaring.

Allocation of chores is another aspect which shows a great deal of gender bias, Tambudzai has to wake up at dawn to fetch water, sweep the yard and prepare tea for the whole family. “I would go to the family fields to work with my mother-sometimes my father and brother in the afternoon”. This sentence shows that men have the luxury of choosing whether to work the fields or not and it is contradictory to an insinuation that women are reproductive with labour. “Your great grandfather was a rich man in the currency of those days, having many fat cattle, large fields and four wives who worked hard to produce bountiful harvests”. This statement has objectified women and has depicted them as possessions which men could use to make ample riches and get all the credit of their hard work alone.

Nhamo: “Don’t you know I am the one who has to go to school”

Tambu: “But I want to go to school”

Nhamo: “wanting won’t help”

Tambu: “why not?”

Nhamo: “it’s the same everywhere, because you are a girl””

The above dialogue portrays how men feel entitled to the privilege of education and complete disregard of women’s wants and desires. This creates a barrier which highlights the supremacy of men over women in a patriarchal society. Furthermore we see women being bound by the confines of societal expectations which limit them and channel them to a live of submission and monotony. “Tambudzai is my daughter is she not? So isn’t it my money?…have you heard of a woman who remains in her father’s house? She will meet a young man and I will have lost everything” this are words uttered by Tambu’s father Jeremiah when he was in denial that his daughter is actually going to school. From these words we can deduce that the importance of women in a patriarchal society is best measured by material benefits men can get from them. Jeremiah is steadfast that he is entitled to whatever belongs to Tambu by default and we realise his fear that once she gets out of his clutches Tambu will have been granted the liberty which he has denied her for his own selfish reasons.

“What did you expect? Did you really think you could send yourself to school?” this statement in conjunction with the bitter truth that Nhamo was stealing Tambu’s mealies shows how much of a mockery the society makes of women’s efforts, the snobbish character that Nhamo depicts creates a hindrance on Tambu’s means to survive. “ Nhamo if you are going to fight your sister who is going to look after her?” This statement although said to instil discipline in Nhamo has also served to reduce women to a state of vulnerability as their safety is being ensured in the hands of men who have not even once showed an ounce of protectiveness towards the women. This thus insinuates that women in the absence of male figures in their lives are prone to attacks which they are incapable of protecting themselves from. The very same statement is ironic because the attack that women are supposedly prone to is coming from the same people who are given the power to protect the women.

“But be sure to ask your father for permission” the preceding statement has managed to strip Ma’shingayi of the parental role in taking decisions concerning the lives of her children. However ironically enough when the child defies and disobeys the father, only then is the mother granted a chance to step in and alleviate the situation, this dissuasion involves the mother swaying the child to do just as the father says. This is portrayed in Jeremiah’s direct order to Ma’shangayi: “tell this child of yours she cannot go to town with that man”. The women are channelled and obligated to adhere their final decisions to the whims of their husbands. This is also portrayed on the decision to take Tambu to the mission by Babamukuru and Jeremiah. However positive the decision was, Ma’shangayi was denied a chance to voice out her opinion before the final decision was made, this shows how men think and belief that out of the two genders they are always right and know what is best for everybody.

An encounter with a white couple (Doris and the husband) serves to show the silence that black women are subjected to. The woman vociferously expresses her disgust towards what she considers as child labour whereas Ma’shangayi advocated for Tambu to sell mealies at the town. This contrast of character ( the white woman is over reactive and outspoken) between a white woman and black woman’s take on things fully highlights how oppressed and blindly docile women in a patriarchal society are. Black women are without a voice and have been made victims of their femininity.

“What about your mother here do you think she doesn’t know what she is doing waiting on me like this?” This is a question addressed by Babamukuru to Nyasha because she ate before he did. This is an epitome of the stereotypic rules which govern a woman’s daily life in a patriarchal society, they are in no way in favour of the women for they are always expected to be selfless, to always be on the giving end and are berated or accused of disobedience once the tables are turned and they are on the receiving end. “She had good reason to be content. She was Babamukuru’s wife. She lived in a comfortable home and was a teacher; unlike her daughter she was grateful for these blessings”. Maiguru‘s docility towards her husband is the one factor which has steered above statement to insinuate that all her happiness roots from her marriage to Babamukuru and if in any way she showed signs of defiance to what Babamukuru says or does like Nyasha usually does she would be considered ungrateful. Moreover women are expected to overlook all the wrongs in their lives because they would be showing ungratefulness.

“Why can’t you behave like a young woman from decent home what will people say when they see Sigauke’s daughter carry on like that? Women are denied the liberty of doing what they want to do, and they are channelled to live their lives treading on eggshells because of the supposed reflection the society will have about their families. They are entrusted with heavy burden of keeping the family reputation intact. This accusation was made without the complete consideration of Nyasha’s side of the story, this shows that no matter what and how sound her explanation was Babamukuru ( Nyasha’s father who she hardly ever see eye to eye with) is always right therefore he must not be questioned. “She has dared, she had dared to raise her fists against me” . As an act of self-defence Nyasha acted on impulse and retaliated when her father continued to mercilessly beat her to a pulp and Babamukuru fails to understand why Nyasha would do that, he lets his emotions and pride consume him completely which lead him to belief that he is not in the wrong and once again puts the blame on Nyasha.

“That was when my grandfather’s daughter’s gained a reputation for being loose women…thus poor Lucia was indicted for both her barrenness and witchery” the judgemental nature of the society is portrayed in the quoted words, this suggests the stigma that barren women are attached to and how they are always ostracized and called names because of their mistakes. Ma’shangayi had fallen pregnant at a tender age and this is the unbecoming incident which gained them this belittling reference. Nothing admonishing is said about the male figure this shows how the society expects perfection from women and how women always bear the brunt of ridicule instead of the men.

A family hearing concerning Lucia was conducted in her and other women’s absence which shows the bias in decision making and shows disregard of the woman’s side of the story. “I’ll have to come back to look after Baba and the children” the fearful tone in which Tambu’s narrates her concerns is proof enough on how women have to live always looking over their shoulders because they are never really free of the societal expectation that a girl has to assume her mother’s role in her absence.

Mariama Ba has portrayed the hardships of women in a patriarchal society through the narration of different women’s marriage lives. Ramatoulaye who had recently been rejected by her husband and had to assume his duties in raising their children has to observe a mirasse in his honour after his death. This shows how women in a patriarchal society are greatly of service to the men even in death because of societal obligation. Binetou , Rama’s co wife was psychologically manipulated and forced to marry Modou by her mother so that she could have the lavish life of living off someone’s pocket

“School turns our girls into devils who lure our men away from the right path”. This is the accusation made by the society when Aissatou and Mawdo were to get married; it was made on the grounds that a man of royal blood was marrying a girl of such low status which was unheard of and unacceptable back then. This statement suggests that educated women are begrudged of their education so much unbecoming or wrong that they do is associated with it to insinuate that it is no good to them. Furthermore women are depicted as villains who disrupt the morality of the society as they stray men from what is right. In addition women are stripped off their moral worthiness as they as they are portrayed to be without direction, respect and sense of morality

Ramatoulaye’s mother in law’s constant visits substantiates the fact that in laws can be liabilities in the marriage of their son. Her satisfaction which reflects only when she receives money goes to show that she has expectations which Ramatoulaye has to fulfil in order to be in her good books. It also goes hand in hand with the willingness of her sister in laws to undo her hair because she had in the past given ample gifts to the said sisters. This reveals that married women are never really judged by how they present themselves but rather what puts them in favour of their in laws are the material things which they give to them. “Our sisters in laws give equal consideration to thirty years and five years of married life” a clear picture of the female’s survival in marriage is revealed and it shows that they have to buy their acceptance into the family and spent most of their married lives trying to impress their in laws in order to not be alienated in the family.

Young Nabou was denied of her chance to choose who to marry because her aunt had in a fit of anger and desire to retaliate had chosen her to be a tool or bait which would help her achieve her sick intention of ending Mawdo’s first marriage. This shows how the society uses women to do their dirty work in expectation that they would keep quiet, women in a patriarchal society are the main weapon that inhibits the survival of other women. On the occasions that Rama and Aissatou’s husbands remarried they were the ones who were last to know and were only told just out of courtesy. This was not frowned upon by the society but it was being promoted this shows that the men had the privilege of marry without fear of retribution.

A brief account of Jacqueline is given to show that women are forced to sacrifice so much in marriage while men get the full package with a little extra advantage to do as they pleased. Jacqueline had sacrificed her comfort zone and married into a completely new culture and instead of her husband helping her familiarise herself with the new environment he cheats on her with other women. Jacqueline’s survival in this society has been inhibited greatly and ends up with a sickness unbeknownst to the doctors but is later revealed that it is depression. “When you have come out, I shall marry you. You suit me as a wife, and further, you will continue to live here” this is a dictation and order from Tamsir (Modou’s older brother) to Rama, from this we realise that by virtue of being the deceased’s brother Tamsir feels entitled to everything that belonged to his brother and how Rama has been objectified as a tool which can be controlled and misused as they pleased.

“My refusals gave me in town a reputation of lioness or mad woman” we can deduce that what Rama had done was rarely heard of and women are always expected to be in need of a male figure in their lives and the value of women in the men’s eyes has still degraded for they have the audacity to come one after the other to seek her hand in marriage this shows complete ignorance of how she could feel about it.

Conclusion

On many levels survival of women in a patriarchal society is a tough going and can come in different forms despite the age and social status of the said woman as had been portrayed and substantiated by the two groups. While women had been oppressed through most of the books, this in turn has managed to attribute and reveal their strong and weak characters which therefore made it easier to find the reasons behind most of their actions.

From investigating on this topic I was able to get a clear picture of how women were treated in the early 1900s. The fact that the books were written by people of different nationalities and the times they were written not being far apart shows the uniformity of women’s lives in African patriarchal societies.