Relationship Abuse: Causes And Victims

Domestic Abuse: Dating abuse

The topic of the essay is relationship abuse also known as domestic abuse. The definition is a pattern of coercive, controlling behavior that is a pervasive life-threatening crime affecting people in all our communities regardless of gender, age, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, religion, social standing, and immigration status (Wikipedia). Statistics say that it is more likely to be women as a victim to their partner. One third actually get killed by their intermediate partner.

Who usually abuses their domestic partner? The main abuser is a man, women can also be the abuser. Usually, it’s a partner and this is very common with ages 16 and up. It can happen when the couple is alone or out in public with a huge cd. This can happen for multiple reasons the abuser is insecure and believe violence is the answer to keep your spouse and won’t leave you, wants dominance in the relationship, or don’t know how else to act. The reason why people stay in the relationship is that they believe that it is love and don’t know the difference, afraid to ask for help because they are being threatened, don’t know that they are in an abusive relationship. Multiple ways to know you are in an abusive relationship is when your partner pressures you into things you don’t want to do, forces you to do things, puts you down by name calling, begging you for consent until you give in so they can stop asking, manipulating to have you do what they want, not allowing you to hang out with other people, stalking you, makes you feel unsafe, they destroy you self confidence where you feel like you need them in your life because without them you are nothing. There are multiple cases where the abuser after you leave them, start stalk you which they could eventually kill you.

Why do people stay in an abusive relationship? There are multiple reasons why because of controlling feelings such as fear, low self-esteem, love, or just not knowing the difference. Another is pressure such as peer/family pressure, culture religious reasons, or pregnant or have kids already today. Distrust in adults or authorities adults just saying it’s puppy love and feel like the adult won’t take them seriously, don’t trust the police to help, or language barriers or immigration policies. Another reason is not having a place to go, reliance on that person, or no money.

What are the dating abuse statistics? One in three adolescents in the U.S are victimized by physical, sexual, verbal, or emotional by a dating person. Studies show that girls and young women between the ages of 16 and 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence almost triple the national average. In college, nearly half of women dating have experienced abuse in their relationship. One in six college students has been sexually abused by a partner. Long effects of being in an abusive relationship Half of youth who have been victims of both dating violence and rape attempt suicide, compared to 12.5% of non-abused girls and 5.4% of non-abused boys. Lack of awareness by 33% of teens never told anyone about the abuse. What do adults and parents think about dating abuse? 82% of parents believe that they would know if their child is in an abusive relationship, but a majority(58%) did not recognize the signs of dating abuse. 81% of parents believe teen violence is not an issue or admit they don’t know its an issue.

Females between the ages of 16 and 24 are roughly 3 times more likely than the rest of the population to be abused by an intimate partner (cite). Eight States in the U.S. does not consider a violent dating relationship as domestic abuse. Therefore, adolescents, teens, and 20-somethings are unable to apply for a restraining order for protection from the abuse. 50% of young people who experience rape or physical or sexual abuse will attempt to commit suicide (cite). Only 1/3 of the teens who were involved in an abusive relationship confided in someone about the violence. Teens who have been abused hesitate to seek help because they do not want to expose themselves or are unaware of the laws surrounding domestic violence. Roughly 1.5 million high school boys and girls in the U.S. admit to being intentionally hit or physically harmed in the last year by someone they are romantically involved with. Teens who suffer dating abuse are subject to long-term consequences like alcoholism, eating disorders, promiscuity, thoughts of suicide, and violent behavior.

What are the signs of being in an abusive relationship? There are multiple different signs to know if you or someone you know are in an abusive relationship with a partner such as Physical abuse includes hitting, kicking, shoving, hurting someone with an object or weapon, or breaking their things on purpose. Sexual abuse includes forcing, pressuring, or blackmailing someone into doing something sexual which includes kissing, touching, or having sex when they don’t want to or are unconscious. Emotional abuse includes bullying behaviors such as name-calling, yelling, and humiliating them in front of close friends and family, keeping them away from friends and family, threatening them, getting them fired from their job on purpose, or stalking. Digital abuse is a type of emotional or sexual abuse. It can include constant texts and phone calls, using social media or GPS/spyware to track someone’s location, stealing passwords, or pressuring them to send explicit photos and videos to the abuser time after time.

What age group is dating abuse more common in? Dating abuse is most common in our youth Dating abuse because it affects around one in ten high school students, and it is likely to be underreported. A CDC survey found that 10% of high school students had been physically hurt by a dating partner on purpose within the past year. This was higher among girls (12%) than boys (7%). Sexual violence was even more common, with 11% of students reporting being forced to do something sexual within the past year by a dating partner. Again, more girls (16%) reported this than boys (5%).

According to loveisrespect.org, teens stay in abusive relationships for many reasons such as the following. Being scared of their abuser, not knowing whether a relationship is abusive or just “intense”, being afraid of being outed if LGBTQ+, Feeling guilty or ashamed as if the abuse is their fault, they deserve to be treated like this. Thinking nobody will believe them, having feelings for their abuser and hoping things will change. Believing it’s “just how it is” or that abuse is acceptable, especially if they saw a lot of abuse as a child between their parents.

The effects are damaging which these statistics are particularly troubling given the lasting impact dating abuse can have on victims. Students that had been abused by a partner were more likely than those that hadn’t to report being bullied on school grounds and missing school because they felt unsafe. Victims are also more likely to become depressed or anxious, use drugs or alcohol, become suicidal, or be abused in future relationships.

How can this be prevented? It can be prevented by teaching pre-teens and teens about healthy relationships is vital in preventing teen dating violence. By promoting positive relationship behaviors, teens learn about what they should expect from peers and how they are expected to behave toward peers, in both intimate and friendship relationships. Pre-teens and teens are forming ideas about relationships that can last a lifetime.

How does the victim feel or is forced to do? Alarming numbers of teens experience and accept abusive behavior in dating relationships. Many teens also feel physically and sexually threatened. 1 in 5 teens who have been in a serious relationship report being hit, slapped or pushed by a partner. 1 in 3 girls who have been in a serious relationship says they’ve been concerned about being physically hurt by their partner. 1 in 4 teens who have been in a serious relationship say that a boyfriend/girlfriend has tried to prevent them from spending time with friends or family. The same number has been pressured to only spend time with their partner and no one else. 1 in 3 girls between the ages of 16 and 18 say sex is expected for people their age in a relationship; half of the teen girls who have experienced sexual pressure report they are afraid the relationship would end if they did not give in. Nearly 1 in 4 girls who have been in a relationship (23%) reported going further sexually than they wanted to as a result of pressure.

The reason why women stay in an abusive relationship may not be understood by the woman or onlookers. Relationships don’t always start out in violence, it progresses to violence. Once a woman realizes her relationship is an unhealthy one she may not be able to leave for a number of reasons. Following is a list of factors that may force a to woman stay. There could be only one factor or a combination of factors that keeps a woman in an abusive relationship.

Threats to harm the victim, loved ones or pets, Threats of suicide, Believing the abuser will take their children, Religious reasons, Believing the abuser will change, Self-blame, Limited financial options, Believing that violence is normal, Believing in the sanctity of marriage and the family, Limited housing options, Blaming the abuse on alcohol, financial pressures, or other outside factors, Low self-esteem, Fear of the unknown, of change, Isolation, Embarrassment and shame, Believing no one can help, Cultural beliefs, Denial, Pressure from friends and family to stay, Economic dependence, She still loves him.

Teen dating abuse, also known as teen dating violence, is a significant public health issue. Adolescents with a history of dating abuse may struggle academically and experience increased the risk for serious injury or even death. They may engage in risky sexual behavior, substance abuse, and unhealthy dieting and exhibit suicidal behaviors. School nurses may be the first adults that teens confide in when experiencing dating abuse and may lack the knowledge and skills to intervene with teens involved in unhealthy dating relationships.

Works Cited (Use Citation Machine to cite these online sources.)

1. www.joinonelove.org/learn/why_leaving_abuse_is_hard/
2. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/progress-notes/201902/secret-dynamics-emotional-sexual-and-physical-abuse
3. https://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/why-do-people-stay/
4. https://www.loveisrespect.org/resources/dating-violence-statistics/
5. https://www.dosomething.org/us/facts/11-facts-about-teen-dating-violence
6. https://www.childrenssafetynetwork.org/blog/facts-teen-dating-abuse
7. http://www.domesticviolenceinfo.ca/article/why-women-stay-199.asp
8. http://www.domesticviolenceinfo.ca/article/dating-abuse-fast-facts-241.asp
9. Freeman, S. A., Rosenbluth, B., & Cotton, L. (2013). Teen Dating Abuse: Recognition and Interventions. NASN School Nurse, 28(2), 79–82. https://doi.org/10.1177/1942602X12469410